Ready For Change...Again
“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.”– Jim Rohn
I believe that I've always carried this unseen force inside of me. This force that's needed to constantly butt up against conventionality. I can easily think of many instances when the status quo just hasn't worked for me, so I found my own way. From as far back as I can remember, I carried what felt like a glowing ember inside me that wanted, that needed to feel free. Needed to push back. Needed to question and seek and discover.Time and time again, I remember trying to push it down. I remember telling myself, "If you only get this job, or that house, or that stuff, or live in that neighborhood, or have those friends, you'll be happier."And then I'd get that job, and that house, and that stuff and I would feel happy for awhile. Accomplished. But, unfailingly, that accomplished feeling would always wear off and give way to feeling restless, stifled, unfulfilled and unhappy.As "right" as I was doing everything. No matter what I did, something just always felt....wrong.Butting up against myself. Again.It was as if my spirit knew something that my body hadn't quite been able to figure out yet. And my inner voice was screaming at me to just, please, wake up.And then I woke.
And so many things became clear to me. Things that I couldn't unsee. Parts of myself that I could finally acknowledge and own. Expectations and limitations that I'd continually put on my life. And for what? For my happiness? Or for this "dream" of happiness that I had been sold?
Somehow, amazingly. I don't know how. But, somehow, it turns out, I found myself a partner who understands all of that. In all the people, in all the world, I was able to find the one man who I can tell all of this to who doesn't think I'm crazy and run for the hills. Instead, he smiles and nods his head in complete and total knowing. And, in fact, has butted up against many of the same things throughout his life. Imagine that.
We are those crazy people.
Remember when I revealed that Chris and I had decided to sell our house (see here)? And then I went on and on about minimalism and wanting to downsize? Well, as in life, things have a tendency to shift. We make plans and The Universe smiles and says, "Um, actually....no."Originally, our plan was to sell our house in the spring and move into a smaller space in a desire to minimize. But life has a way of happening and somewhere along the way, with each new curve and new road – new pathways are revealed and new ideas start to emerge.And, now, we are moving into what will surely be our biggest idea. Ever.Since becoming parents in 2014, Chris and I have both experienced some incredible shifts in perspective. I might even go so far to say that our worlds completely changed. We completely changed. The saying is so true, "You don't know what you don't know." And this is certainly true for parenting.I've often described parenthood as "taking a walk through the looking glass." The world is mostly the same, but also completely different. Transformed.Things that once fit, no longer feel as comfortable. Relationships that once felt easy, now feel like walking a tightrope and vice versa. Things you were once tolerant of, no longer fly. Things you once desired now seem frivolous and silly.And where all those things once held space, new ideas you never even imagined start to take form – bright and shiny and hopeful. The future, somehow, feels much more tangible and important.So where does that leave us now? Today.... As adults and parents with jobs and bills and debt and responsibilities, who have also figured out that they need something else? Who need to experience some other way of "doing life"– if such a thing exists? Who sit in their nice suburban home, with their nice cars, and nice stuff, and seemingly beautiful, happy life – feeling a little lost and a little empty and a lot unhappy?Well folks, some of you already guessed it.
We are selling our home and most of our belongings and ditching "life as we know it" to work and travel the US in a tiny home on wheels. Yep, we are officially cashing in our investment on this "American Dream" to make our own American dream as full-time RVers.
I can hear your questions:
How long are you going to do this? What about the dogs and the cat and Jonah? Do you even know anything about RVing? When are you going to do this? How will you earn an income on the road?
And the answers are:
We don't know. They're coming with us and will be fine. Nope, but we'll learn. Shooting for early 2018, but we have a lot of shit to get in order before then, so we'll see. Most of my income is already remote so I can work from the RV as long as I have good internet and we'll be back in MN during the summer – which is our busiest season for performing.I wish I could tell you a lot more right now and believe me, there will be more to come, I'm sure. But for now, we are probably about as clueless as you are. There are so many unknowns in this. And we will have so much to learn and discover along the way.The one thing we do know is that we are ready for change. We are ready to forge a new path. Wanna come along?
“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.”- Andre Gide